15 months after starting...

Dear friend,

       I began running last January because it was something I was convinced was impossible for me. I was terrified when I started and hated every minute of it for months, but I was just NOT going to fail. I needed that power that comes from conquering an impossible thing, and I gave myself a lot of slack but never quit. I was not comparing myself to ANYone. That was hard. It was truly a journey of self-discovery... learning that I was stronger than I thought, learning that I could succeed, not just fail (there go the tears, that was a hard thing to accept!) and truly understanding perserverance for the first time in my life. This was not about losing weight so I could look good, or even be healthy! It was cutting to the core of my self-image and I stayed vulnerable for the whole year! It was WAY more emotional than physical, which was always a surprise.
People started telling me I was looking good, losing weight, etc, and I flat out denied it. I was scared of success, scared of owning an accomplishment. What if it went away?
And then, slowly, *I* started to not be able to deny it any more. I was -gasp- looking forward to my runs. I wasn't able to wear anything I owned. I had to go shopping and the sizes kept getting smaller. I trepidatiously began to allow the possibility of success to grow in my thoughts and I felt happiness creeping in. I felt powerful, because here I was, 10-11 months later, sticking with it. Then the Bridge Run came. I had run a 5K around a track a couple of times, but never trained on a hill, so I wasn't hopeful I'd be able to run the whole thing. I did, though. I ran and felt the euphoria of success. I felt like a conquerer! Me! That was it, I had become a runner. Or at least my version of one, which is good enough, thank you, Lord!
So, after that has been a plateau of four months with little or no progress and I don't run 3x a week, but at least once. I felt kind of low after such a high in December, and that was weird but I think it's part of the journey, too. Now, I know that I will continue. There is just NO way that I will let that hard work last year go to waste! Plus, I still love going out to run and clear my mind. I never thought I would say that. As far as food, I feel like somewhere along the emotional way, my addiction to food broke and I just started eating less. Still, no rules for me! I am planning this year to run farther than my 3 miles, but I'm not stressed about it.

Love,
Trish

Week 17: Back in the Saddle

4-24-12: It's been seven whole days of no exercise. I felt like a beginner almost on the treadmill! I walked 5 minutes to warm up, then ran for 20 minutes, a mile and a half. That was all I had. I've lost TEN minutes of running somewhere! I intend to find it again, soon! My goal is to run 3.1 miles a month from now.

Week 16: Sickness

4-16-12: Ran 2.25 miles AGAIN!! I can do this.

The rest of the week, I didn't run at all because I was sick.

Week 15

4-9-12 Ran on the treadmill, 2.25 miles

4-12-12: 2.25 miles

4-14-12: 2.25 miles

Total Miles Run in 2012:

75.58!!

Week 14

4-3-12: Decided to run outside today to change it up. I just LOVE the Island Y's outdoor trail. It's exactly one mile and mostly shaded. I took off and felt great! I ran around the whole entire track, something I could never dream of doing a couple months ago. My goal was to get to 1.75 miles, but I began walking at 1.5 miles. Running outside is a lot harder than running on my treadmill, what with the HEAT and UPHILL parts!! Anyway, I ran four more minutes after a short walking break and felt good about today's run. (2 miles)

4-5-12: Found this article, which is EXACTLY what I was wanting so badly when I started in January! Oh well, at least I've learned all these tips by now myself!  10 Tips for Beginning Runners

4-6-12: I ran outside with Sarah this time, and we ran TWO miles!!! Woohoo!!! (2.25)

Week Thirteen

3-28-12: Waited til Wednesday to start my three runs/week cycle. Not smart; now I have to run Friday and Sunday to fit them all in. Went to the gym at noon to run and realized I had not had anything to eat since last night. Also not smart. How am I supposed to run for 25 minutes? Bottom line: I didn't. I struggled and struggled to maintain my progress and stopped at 22 minutes. I learned the importance of giving my body the fuel it needs to succeed. You really can't run for long on empty. (1.85 miles)

3-30-12: Did it. Ran 25 minutes. I'm up to running 1.75 miles without stopping! Also, for two- four minutes songs I ran at a much faster pace. I felt like Trish, the machine! (2.04 miles)

4-1-12: I RAN A WHOLE 5K TODAY!!! April Fools! I did, however, run 25 minutes again. (2.06)

Week Twelve: Cool

3-20-12:  "WHY DO I HAVE TO DO IT AGAIN?" I whined all day.  I've already run for 22 minutes. I already did my impossible! Today was a struggle to find motivation. Is it always like this after a success?

Anyway, after a pep talk from Ben which included the words, "because once is nothing," I went back to the Y and ran the stinkin' 22 minutes again. It was hard. (1.90)

3-22-12: Got to run with Sarah at the Y today. It was fun! Yes, I know I just said running was fun. But you know? Watching those minute-milestones go by (Remember when we thought two minutes was hard?) while we keep on running is really cool. At the end of the run, I looked at Sarah and said, "We can just do this anytime we want now." Way cool. (1.97)

3-25-12: Did it yet again...22 straight minutes. It was harder this time. Maybe I am losing interest in my music. Maybe I'm just tired. Oh well. I did it. (1.85)

Total miles run in 2012:

58.63!!